We all have outlandish dreams of “what we’ll be when we grow up.” Some kids dream of spacewalking as astronauts, some dream of game-winning shots in basketball, and some dream of becoming stars in Hollywood. When I was young, the one job I wanted more than anything was as a Nintendo game counselor.
I know this is hard to imagine now, but back in the late ‘80s and early ‘90s, the heyday of the NES, there was no internet (at least not in regular usage.) If you were stuck in a game, you couldn’t just hit Google up for a FAQ or walkthrough. There was really only one option: the Nintendo Power Hotline, where you could talk to a totally awesome, totally LIVE game counselor to help you with your gaming problems.
I will freely admit that I needed their services quite a few times. I remember phoning once for help on the original Zelda, and I also recall needing their expert assistance in Castlevania II: Simon’s Quest. (I will also freely admit that even today I have no qualms about using and abusing walkthroughs and guides – I don’t have time to muck about in my games. 
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I remember imagining what it would be like to work as a game play counselor. I pictured them sitting in cubicles wearing headsets, hammering away at NES controllers while they played the latest and greatest games. They must have been surrounded by binders covering everything from the Adventures of Lolo to Zanac. At the time I had no real concept of computer databases, which is most likely what they actually used. The whole constant game-playing part was probably not true either, but I like to imagine that it was.
For a kid who loved video games like I did, what could have been better? You mean I could get paid to play games and help kids beat Mother Brain in Super Metroid? Hell yeah! Sadly, as with all dreams, at some point you wake up. After poking around this new-fangled internet a bit, I found out that Nintendo shut the program down some time in 2005. Frankly, I’m surprised it lasted that long; I know by the late ‘90s there were virtually unlimited online resources for all your gaming hang-ups.
And I’ll also admit that I never made any real attempt to become a game play counselor. By the time I was old enough to give it a shot, my burning desire for the job had morphed into a burning desire for girls. (Plus, growing the required mullet would probably dash any hopes I had of attracting the opposite sex.) I still occasionally wax nostalgic about my old career dreams, but more often I try to focus on my career dream of today – writing about video games.
